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Ann Coulter (archive) December 20, 2001 Attack France! As pundits mull whether America's next target
in the war on terrorism should be Iraq or a smaller quarry first – such as
the Sudan or Somalia – it's time to consider another petri dish of
ferocious anti-American hatred and terrorist activity. The Bush doctrine
is: We are at war not only with the terrorists, but also with those who
harbor them.
We've got to attack France.
Having exhausted itself in a spirited fight with the Nazis in the last
war, France cannot work up the energy to oppose terrorism. For decades
now, France has nurtured, coddled and funded Islamic terrorists.
(Moreover, the Great Satan is getting a little sick of our McDonald's
franchises being attacked on behalf of notoriously inefficient French
dairy farmers.)
At the 1972 Olympics, Muslim terrorists assassinated 11 Israeli
athletes and one German policeman. Five years later, acting on
intelligence from Israeli secret police, French counterespionage agents
arrested the reputed mastermind of the massacre, Abu Daoud. Both Israel
and West Germany sought the extradition of Daoud. Afraid of upsetting
Muslim terrorists, France refused on technical grounds and set him free.
In 1986, Libyan agents of Moammar Gadhafi planted a bomb in a West
Berlin discotheque, killing an American serviceman and a Turkish woman.
Hundreds more were injured. President Reagan retaliated with air strikes
against Libyan military targets – including Gadhafi's living quarters.
Quaking in the face of this show of manly force, France denied America
the use of its airspace. As a consequence, American pilots were required
to begin their missions from airbases in Britain. When the pilots finally
made it to Tripoli, tired from the long flights and showing a puckish
sense of humor, they bombed the French embassy by mistake. POW! So sorry,
our mistake.
France has repeatedly decried economic sanctions against Iraq and has
accused the United Nations of manufacturing evidence against Saddam
Hussein. The U.N., not even the Great Satan. The French U.N. ambassador
dismissed aerial photographs of Iraqi military trucks fleeing inspections
sites just before U.N. weapons inspectors arrived as – quote – "perhaps a
truckers' picnic."
Along with the rest of the European Union, France sends millions of
dollars to the Palestinian Authority every year. Sucking up to the P.A.
has really paid dividends to the craven butterbellies. While visiting
Arafat in Gaza last year to announce several million more dollars in aid,
Prime Minister Lionel Jospin was attacked by angry, stone-throwing
Palestinian students.
Earlier this year, France connived with human-rights champions China
and Cuba to toss the United States off the U.N. Human Rights Commission.
Sudan took America's place, and, if its diplomats are not too bogged down
with human torture and slave trading, they are very much looking forward
to attending the meetings.
This summer, Paris made Mumia Abu-Jamal an honorary citizen of Paris.
In America's cowboy, bloodlust, rush-to-judgment approach to the death
penalty, this convicted Philadelphia cop-killer has been sitting on death
row – and giving radio interviews and college commencement addresses – for
20 years. Since "Mumia" sounds like a Muslim terrorist, Parisians can use
the same bumper stickers for the war.
Two weeks into America's war on terrorism, Le Figaro began calling for
"American restraint." In polls, 47 percent of the French said they
believed the U.S. military action was failing. Seventeen percent thought
it was working (which was – admittedly – 17 percent more than on the New
York Times editorial page). Flaunting France's well-established reputation
as a fearsome fighting machine, the French foreign minister, Hubert
Vedrine, immediately advised the United States to stop bombing
Afghanistan.
The first indictment to come out of the Sept. 11 attacks was of a
French national, Zacarias Moussaoui. He is believed to be the intended
20th hijacker on Bloody Tuesday. France quickly moved to extend consular
protection for Moussaoui. Intriguingly, French Justice Minister Marylise
Lebranchu has demanded that Moussaoui not be executed.
Mlle. Lebranchu seems to have forgotten, but WE ARE THE GREAT SATAN! We
also have Moussaoui. It's annoying enough when these celebrated Nazi
slayers refuse to extradite terrorists on the grounds that America does
not observe the pristine judicial formalities of their pals, China, Cuba
and the Sudan. But under what zany theory of international law does France
think it can tell us what to do with a terrorist we caught right here on
U.S. soil?
The Great Satan is wearying of this reverse hegemony, in which little
pipsqueak nations try to impose their pipsqueak values on us. Aren't we
the ones who should be arrogantly oppressing countries that unaccountably
do not have the death penalty?
And now, as America goes about building support for an attack on Iraq –
guess who's complaining? The turtlenecked chickens are terrified of
offending fanatical Muslims and inviting a terrorist attack, but Arab
leaders are supposed to face down the vastly larger populations of crazies
living in their own countries. While France whines, Turkey – a
predominantly Muslim country, I note – is preparing its airstrips for a
possible U.S. attack on Iraq.
If this is a war against terrorism and not a Eurocentric war against
Islam, the conclusion is ineluctable: We must attack France. What are they
going to do? Fight us?
©2001 Universal Press Syndicate
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